Tips For A Happy And Successful Marriage

The young and excited bride-and-groom-to-be; ecstatic about the upcoming wedding and marriage and the joy that it will bring. Three to six months later, reality has set in and both spouses realize that marriage is no easy task, but one that takes a great deal of effort and patience. The following are tips for both wives and husbands, to help make the task a little less daunting, and to increase the many rewards that are possible in such a marvelous and complex relationship.

Enter the Marriage with the Right Intention and Renew this Often

Both spouses should enter the marriage with the pure intention of pleasing Allah, subhanahu wa ta'ala, in order to receive His grace and blessings. The marriage itself then becomes an act of worship and one for which both spouses will be rewarded.

Remember that Your Spouse is also Your Brother or Sister in Islam

Too often Muslims treat other people outside the home with kindness and sincerity, but then behave in a very different manner when it comes to their own spouses. Muslims should always remember that one's spouse is also another brother or sister in Islam and that the rights and duties that apply to the general brotherhood (sisterhood) of Islam, should also form the basis of the marital relationship.

Do Not Hold Unrealistic Expectations

Before marriage, people often have unrealistic ideas about their spouse-to-be, expecting perfection in all aspects. This rarely, if ever, plays out in reality and can lead to unnecessary problems and concerns.

Emphasize the Best in Your Spouse

كن أفضل صديق لزوجك

حاول أن تفكر في معنى أن تكون صديقًا حميمًا وكن كذلك لزوجك. قد يعني هذا مشاركة الاهتمامات والخبرات والأحلام.

اقضِ وقتًا ممتعًا معًا

لا يكفي مشاركة الوجبات والأعمال المنزلية والحديث العابر. يجب أن يجد الأزواج وقتًا للتركيز على تقوية العلاقة.

عبر عن مشاعرك بانتظام

قد يكون هذا مفهومًا "غربياً" لكن من المهم أن يكون الشخص منفتحًا وصادقًا بشأن مشاعره.

اعترف بالأخطاء واطلب المغفرة

Just as we ask Allah to forgive us when we make mistakes, we should also do the same with our spouses. The stronger person is the one who can admit when he or she is wrong, request pardon from the other, and work hard to improve his/her aspects that are in need of change.

Never Bring up Mistakes of the Past

It can be very hurting for another person to be reminded of past mistakes. In Islam, it is generally not recommended to dwell on the past.

Surprise Each Other at Times

This may entail bringing home a small gift or flowers, preparing a special meal, dressing up and beautifying oneself, or sending a secret note in a lunchbox.

Have a Sense of Humour

This particular aspect can go a long way in preventing arguments and brightening the atmosphere of the home.

Quick Tips for Discussions and Disagreements

Quick Tips for Discussions and Disagreements

Dr. Aisha Hamdan

[Source: Madrasa In'aamiyyah]